Names On The Brain

I'm thinking of changing the name of my blog. 

Living Large and Staying Cool
Living Large and Staying Sane
Living Large and Staying Small Cool

The reason for this possible upcoming change is because if all goes well and according to plan I will be getting quite large in about 6 months when I hit my third trimester. 

That's right readers!  This girl is growing a baby!!!!

Yes there are really 2 tests there because we were a little shocked and surprised, and we thought maybe we didn't know how to read this cryptic blue line that clearly states positive, or as we say on the interwebz BFP, Big Fat POSITIVE! 

 This was the first time I took a pregnancy test with my husband and it was a beautiful thing for me to go through the wave of emotions as I made some realizations.  We were about to stop at Macys to pick me up some new bras (weight loss side effect) on our way to get sushi.  Both of these things were no longer going to happen.  No new bras because I would quickly grow out of them (I already am) and no sushi because it's raw and all that.  So we had no plans.  It was like "woah".  We sat in the bed and just talked.  I realized I was about to gain back the weight I lost plus some, go through painful labor and childbirth, learn to nurse, and be responsible for another human being.  I realized we were going to have to finally get that king sized bed so we don't smush the baby if I bring it into bed with us to feed.  I realized that I was going to have a lifelong friend and companion to mold into a good moral hardworking person with the help of the man I love.   It was beautiful to watch Brian go through the emotions, beginning at blissful ignorance and all the way to acceptance and then excitement to a new glow I've never seen in him.   It is like I watched him change into a father and caretaker over the course of a few hours.  See I initially played off the missed period pretty well  - "babe I missed my period and my boobs are sore and I'm a little nauseous, dizzy, and STARVING, but there's no way I could possibly be pregnant, even though we stopped using birth control about a year ago because there's like only 24 hours a month where it can happen but maybe we should pick up a test juuuuust in case".  Bless  his heart, and his selective hearing.  He thought that if I told myself (and him) that it couldn't be, even though it was obvious, than it couldn't be.  I was wrong,  (it happens on occasion even if I don't like to admit it) and 6 weeks pregnant!  We called my PCP and she got us in for a more professional test the following morning.  She confirmed the EPT and put me on prenatal vitamins.  I made my appointment with my longtime OBGYN for May 31 when I will be near 10 weeks.  And now I wait.  And eat.  And sleep. 

I'm really hoping to stay fit and healthy through this pregnancy.  I understand that I will gain weight.  I know I need to in order to make a healthy baby and I am comfortable with that.  I am ECSTATIC that I've gotten to a  happy weight now.  All my blood work came back fantastic that I had done 2 weeks ago when I was unknowingly carrying our little kidney bean.  I've been taking vitamins since February which I hadn't done in my entire life.  I am strong and fit, my blood pressure is great, it is just the right time.  We are blessed.  We both know several people who are struggling to conceive or to carry full term, and for some reason God still chose us.  I feel like the luckiest girl in the world. 

I also constantly feel nervous that I will miscarry.  So I am doing exactly what my body tells me to do.  My body tells me to eat a chocolate muffin, I do.  Tells me to go back to sleep (which is what it is saying most often lately) I do.  I really look forward to getting back to exercising but right now until my body tells me it wants to, I'm just lazing and grazing.  I don't want to lose this.  Reality is I am 34 years old and I have a 15-25% chance to miscarry in the first trimester, so I am prepared to accept the fact that this may not be our exact time.  If something happens and this really is not our time, than it is not for a reason.  I thought about not coming out and telling everyone so soon because I don't want to have to explain it if something bad does happen, but I've always been an open book, so why stop now? 

I started looking at names today.   This might be a new blog.  I'm not sure if I am going to use this forum to document my diet and exercise, or if I will get a separate journal for that.  I think it will just be an outlet for me to write a little and for my out of town friends and family to keep up with my growing family.  So there it is.  Baby Names and Blog Titles.  I guess I will do a new "About Me" also.  Exciting times :)